In my teens I consumed a considerable amount of science fiction. A staple was the scenario where a new disease, a new technology such as nuclear weapons, a death ray, or a novel social order - think "Atlas Shrugged" - threatens to wipe out humanity, or worse reduce the Average Man to brain-dead servitude. As we head into the new fall a…
In my teens I consumed a considerable amount of science fiction. A staple was the scenario where a new disease, a new technology such as nuclear weapons, a death ray, or a novel social order - think "Atlas Shrugged" - threatens to wipe out humanity, or worse reduce the Average Man to brain-dead servitude. As we head into the new fall and winter of short, cold days, I cannot escape a certain unease - a feeling that the world is careening out of control - a hellbound train locked on the rails, and that the attacks are coming from so many directions that one doesn't know which threat to fight first.
The traditional Battle of the Sexes, long the subject of comedy, is to my eye not funny anymore. I've had a little brush with it myself, and given the current social - and more importantly, legal - climate, I could not recommend marriage to any young man. Your spouse gets her panties in a wad, and bang! - no-fault divorces are trivially easy; all the prior obstacles to divorce which kept families together during the inevitable rough patches are gone. Fifty percent of first marriages fail, 65% of second, 75% of third, and if you have children - given the "family law" courts' proclivities - you have just locked yourself into supporting someone you don't like for decades, relegated to seeing your own children one evening every other week, maybe living out of your car or jailed for being a "deadbeat dad." Deadbeat? Really, or just broke? Date - or especially marry - an American woman? These days you'd have to be out of your mind.
No, the infiltration of the West's traditions and institutions by socialist/communist soreheads bent on its destruction is nearly complete. Our enemies have figured out how to use our own freedoms against us - as they said they would. Clearly the whole issue is in question. I believe we are in one of those eras that humanity brings upon itself regularly: fight for everything you are worth, or succumb. And if you must succumb, save the last bullet for yourself.
Leaving aside the socialist/communist infiltration for a moment, which may or may not be having a significant effect on dating, what you wrote about the pitfalls of marriage is definitely true.
I am divorced, and it is financially devastating. I could be living well and getting ready for retirement if I had married better (or maybe if my ex wife had?). Instead, retirement is a far off dream, if it is possible at all, and I am watching half of my net pay go out the door every year with the resulting effect on my quality of life.
I laughed at the comedians who joked about losing half their money, but it isn’t funny anymore. I guess I can tell my own son that he would have to be crazy to marry someone who doesn’t have his/her own career. My own father didn’t have this problem, but he was luckier. He grew up in a different time and he chose better.
Despite this, I know I could have been far unluckier. My ex accused me of abusing our son and tried to get sole custody when we divorced, but it didn’t work. Our son is still in my life, and I am thankful for that every day. I personally know at least five men who got divorced and lost their children. As bad as I feel for being forced to give away half my money to a person I truly dislike, it doesn’t come close to the pain these other men feel.
Honestly, why there are not more murders committed by devastated, despondent fathers with nothing to lose is beyond me. Perhaps it's because of their children. As I discovered later, my second wife had an agenda from day one - hypergamy - marrying up to gain access to resources. (Friends never tell you anything until it's so late in the game that it doesn't matter. And here I always thought she wanted me for my scintillating engineer's personality....) The moment she refused to sign a prenup is the day I should have showed her the door. Fortunately we never had any children; she wanted to do so badly, but despite my refusal, of course she "found herself pregnant." Also fortunately, she was too old, with too little hormones, to carry to term. I'm sure a lot smarter now. Just have to educate my sons, although we all know what has no conscience - or brains.
Mine also wouldn’t sign a prenup, and like you, I should have known then and shown her the door. There were a lot of other warning signs. As they say, I saw the red flags and thought it was the circus. The reality distortion field of being in love is powerful.
Sure, but it's the custodial parent's name on the cheques. It's not like it's going into a trust for when the kid turns 18.
It's understandable for someone to resent writing a cheque with their ex-wife's name on it. I remember a movie quote once - "Marriage is buying a house for someone you hate."
In my teens I consumed a considerable amount of science fiction. A staple was the scenario where a new disease, a new technology such as nuclear weapons, a death ray, or a novel social order - think "Atlas Shrugged" - threatens to wipe out humanity, or worse reduce the Average Man to brain-dead servitude. As we head into the new fall and winter of short, cold days, I cannot escape a certain unease - a feeling that the world is careening out of control - a hellbound train locked on the rails, and that the attacks are coming from so many directions that one doesn't know which threat to fight first.
The traditional Battle of the Sexes, long the subject of comedy, is to my eye not funny anymore. I've had a little brush with it myself, and given the current social - and more importantly, legal - climate, I could not recommend marriage to any young man. Your spouse gets her panties in a wad, and bang! - no-fault divorces are trivially easy; all the prior obstacles to divorce which kept families together during the inevitable rough patches are gone. Fifty percent of first marriages fail, 65% of second, 75% of third, and if you have children - given the "family law" courts' proclivities - you have just locked yourself into supporting someone you don't like for decades, relegated to seeing your own children one evening every other week, maybe living out of your car or jailed for being a "deadbeat dad." Deadbeat? Really, or just broke? Date - or especially marry - an American woman? These days you'd have to be out of your mind.
No, the infiltration of the West's traditions and institutions by socialist/communist soreheads bent on its destruction is nearly complete. Our enemies have figured out how to use our own freedoms against us - as they said they would. Clearly the whole issue is in question. I believe we are in one of those eras that humanity brings upon itself regularly: fight for everything you are worth, or succumb. And if you must succumb, save the last bullet for yourself.
Leaving aside the socialist/communist infiltration for a moment, which may or may not be having a significant effect on dating, what you wrote about the pitfalls of marriage is definitely true.
I am divorced, and it is financially devastating. I could be living well and getting ready for retirement if I had married better (or maybe if my ex wife had?). Instead, retirement is a far off dream, if it is possible at all, and I am watching half of my net pay go out the door every year with the resulting effect on my quality of life.
I laughed at the comedians who joked about losing half their money, but it isn’t funny anymore. I guess I can tell my own son that he would have to be crazy to marry someone who doesn’t have his/her own career. My own father didn’t have this problem, but he was luckier. He grew up in a different time and he chose better.
Despite this, I know I could have been far unluckier. My ex accused me of abusing our son and tried to get sole custody when we divorced, but it didn’t work. Our son is still in my life, and I am thankful for that every day. I personally know at least five men who got divorced and lost their children. As bad as I feel for being forced to give away half my money to a person I truly dislike, it doesn’t come close to the pain these other men feel.
Honestly, why there are not more murders committed by devastated, despondent fathers with nothing to lose is beyond me. Perhaps it's because of their children. As I discovered later, my second wife had an agenda from day one - hypergamy - marrying up to gain access to resources. (Friends never tell you anything until it's so late in the game that it doesn't matter. And here I always thought she wanted me for my scintillating engineer's personality....) The moment she refused to sign a prenup is the day I should have showed her the door. Fortunately we never had any children; she wanted to do so badly, but despite my refusal, of course she "found herself pregnant." Also fortunately, she was too old, with too little hormones, to carry to term. I'm sure a lot smarter now. Just have to educate my sons, although we all know what has no conscience - or brains.
Mine also wouldn’t sign a prenup, and like you, I should have known then and shown her the door. There were a lot of other warning signs. As they say, I saw the red flags and thought it was the circus. The reality distortion field of being in love is powerful.
They say fentanyl is powerful. It's sugar-water compared to oxytocin. At least with fentanyl you die quickly.
No quite the implication he states. Why not ask a question to clarify rather than be a jerk?
In context, he is clearly talking about marriage and divorce, not his children. Yeesh!
I imagine most parents would prefer to be the one receiving those cheques to sending them.
Sure, but it's the custodial parent's name on the cheques. It's not like it's going into a trust for when the kid turns 18.
It's understandable for someone to resent writing a cheque with their ex-wife's name on it. I remember a movie quote once - "Marriage is buying a house for someone you hate."
That's assuming 100% of it gets spent on the kid, and none of it goes to subsidizing her lifestyle.