Life offers consequences. Go out when it's cold without a coat and you'll experience a consequence. Don't listen to mom when it's time to leave the playdate and next time she says we can't do a playdate today because yesterday it took too long to leave, but we'll try again another time. Eat too much dessert and you might have a tummy ach…
Life offers consequences. Go out when it's cold without a coat and you'll experience a consequence. Don't listen to mom when it's time to leave the playdate and next time she says we can't do a playdate today because yesterday it took too long to leave, but we'll try again another time. Eat too much dessert and you might have a tummy ache. Misread a recipe and put too much baking soda in your cookies and they will taste bad.
As tempting as it is to think that parenting is about raising children who "obey", obedience should not be our highest value in society. Look where that got us during the pandemic. Thinking through and appraising one's actions for one's self should be our goal in raising children. It's only through making mistakes and understanding the impact of our mistakes that we're able to alter our behavior from an internally motivated place.
Relational parenting that offers consistent love, guidance and appropriate boundaries is considerably more difficult than just punishing your child for disobedience. All healthy children defy their parents and if they don't they're not healthy. Those raised with punishments will typically defy by sneaking and lying. Those raised to be in relationship will do it openly and stay relational.
I want my child to work out things for herself and want her to take risks so I offer as much autonomy as I can. I also want her to know she can come to me with her mistakes and I'll support her when she needs it.
Life offers consequences. Go out when it's cold without a coat and you'll experience a consequence. Don't listen to mom when it's time to leave the playdate and next time she says we can't do a playdate today because yesterday it took too long to leave, but we'll try again another time. Eat too much dessert and you might have a tummy ache. Misread a recipe and put too much baking soda in your cookies and they will taste bad.
As tempting as it is to think that parenting is about raising children who "obey", obedience should not be our highest value in society. Look where that got us during the pandemic. Thinking through and appraising one's actions for one's self should be our goal in raising children. It's only through making mistakes and understanding the impact of our mistakes that we're able to alter our behavior from an internally motivated place.
Relational parenting that offers consistent love, guidance and appropriate boundaries is considerably more difficult than just punishing your child for disobedience. All healthy children defy their parents and if they don't they're not healthy. Those raised with punishments will typically defy by sneaking and lying. Those raised to be in relationship will do it openly and stay relational.
I want my child to work out things for herself and want her to take risks so I offer as much autonomy as I can. I also want her to know she can come to me with her mistakes and I'll support her when she needs it.