Thank you for this important work Mr. Brooks. A comment I continue to hear from young people is a lament that they will be “the first generation to have less than their parents”. I really struggle advising about this concern as objectively my children’s lives, to this point, have seemed charmed. My understanding of their primary concerns hover around the following: housing affordability, student debt, healthcare costs, AI & robotics stealing their future and potentially destroying the world. While I agree those are significant problems & heavy concerns my worry is the attitude with which this generation seems to confront these challenges. It seems to be full of resentment, anger & fear and a certain apathy due to a perceived forgone conclusion that they are all “screwed”. Writing about a historical perspective of how other generations confronted big problems and overcame them with grit and determination rather than blame and quitting would be amazing. How do we help them to be hopeful & empowered? How do we help them lean into their faith that speaks of the inherent dignity and value of humans that can never be replaced by a robot? How do we help them find happiness in a world trying to disempower them? What a blessing you have to be a strong, encouraging voice engaged in this conversation. Press On.
Arthur, you use the word "renaissance" to describe what we need, and you use the word "pandemic" to describe that we are all unhappy. Both words imply that the people were much happier many years ago. But were they? Maybe the average level of happiness was always the same, varying greatly person-to-person.
I recently read a useless article in NYT on being proactive about finding community. What strategies are there for finding friends and happiness as a retired adult, whose mind is still keen?
I would love to know how to be more happy living with hypochondria. Worry seems to be one of the main drivers for unhappiness (anxiety). I look forward to reading your column.
I look forward to learning more. My life took a turn as a teen when my father passed. A switch turned on and I became a "me against the world" person. My faith was damaged, my outlook turned negative. I used medication and alcohol to feel better. This I learned after 30 years was not the answer and likely caused more suffering. I got sober and thought it would be the cure. It wasn't. The happiness I searched for didn't magically appear. One week ago I retired and I thought that would be the cure. Hard work and savings finally paid off. Travel, golf, skiing, and the immense love of my wife, daughter, and grandkids had to be the key. Sadly no. My health is good, the stress of my working years is no longer. Why am I not on a cloud? Hopefully you can teach me a little about what can be done to make my outlook a bit more happy.
Thank you for your work. I’ve been following your content for years, mainly through podcasts. But never really learned your own happiness journey in this depth. When I saw you in The Free Press, I felt my “world’s” were colliding — and in the very best way. I look forward to your column; and it is coming at just the right time for myself and as you stated, for all of us.
You make it sound like happiness is nearly 100% within the control of an individual. But a lot of unhappiness is attributable to what others are doing. Yes, we control our response to the actions of others, both near and distant. But that doesn't mean those actions don't still deeply undermine individuals. I hope you address that reality.
My sainted mum told me that time flies when you are happy, unfortunately it also flies when you are unhappy. The choice she also told me is up to you. Happiness is like boredom, if you are bored it is because you are boring.
For virtually all of human history, "happiness" was neither a goal nor even a recognized concept.
The daily objective of the average person has historically been to not starve to death, to not be torn asunder by wild animals, to not be killed by aggressive human rivals, and to not die from chronic infections and diseases.
And yet amidst our unexpected, remarkable, indeed miraculous good fortune, "Anger, stress, sadness, and worry have reached historic highs?" No, they have not. It's simply that we have the extraordinary luxury of staring at our navels and worrying endlessly about the lint therein.
Right, we do have that extraordinary luxury; and I for one am glad those like MrBrooks are helping society reconcile the gap between that fact (our luck to be born now) and the day-to-day reality many live with. It seems we spend our time (as a global population) on much less noble or valuable pursuits than understanding how our caveman mind deals with this advanced world.
I hope that your next piece will provide your personal definition of “happiness.” In reading the comments and even in reading your piece, it seems to me that what constitutes happiness is not the same thing for everyone.
I wasn't going to read this as I am an extremely optimistic person and generally happy. But I have a 20 something cynical, pessimistic daughter who I pray for nightly. I literally ask the Lord to give her peace and contentment and gratitude. Maybe this column will have tips I can pass on to her. Ironically, she was raised in privilege with an intact family, while my background is full of abuse, abandonment and poverty. But I knew the Lord from an early age and though I tried to raise her to know Him as well, she still is unhappy.
I have quoted many times from a speech you gave in Houston while you were still with AEI. The essence of it was the secret to a happy life was “use things and love people” not the other way around. Welcome to TFP - my daughter works there too!
He wrote a NYT article about it as well. So simple, yet powerful, here is an excerpt that I refer to often:
This was Abd al-Rahman's formula as he sleepwalked through life. It is the worldly snake oil peddled by the culture makers from Hollywood to Madison Avenue. But you know in your heart that it is morally disordered and a likely road to misery. You want to be free of the sticky cravings of unhappiness and find a formula for happiness instead. How? Simply invert the deadly formula and render virtuous:
Thank you for this important work Mr. Brooks. A comment I continue to hear from young people is a lament that they will be “the first generation to have less than their parents”. I really struggle advising about this concern as objectively my children’s lives, to this point, have seemed charmed. My understanding of their primary concerns hover around the following: housing affordability, student debt, healthcare costs, AI & robotics stealing their future and potentially destroying the world. While I agree those are significant problems & heavy concerns my worry is the attitude with which this generation seems to confront these challenges. It seems to be full of resentment, anger & fear and a certain apathy due to a perceived forgone conclusion that they are all “screwed”. Writing about a historical perspective of how other generations confronted big problems and overcame them with grit and determination rather than blame and quitting would be amazing. How do we help them to be hopeful & empowered? How do we help them lean into their faith that speaks of the inherent dignity and value of humans that can never be replaced by a robot? How do we help them find happiness in a world trying to disempower them? What a blessing you have to be a strong, encouraging voice engaged in this conversation. Press On.
Arthur, you use the word "renaissance" to describe what we need, and you use the word "pandemic" to describe that we are all unhappy. Both words imply that the people were much happier many years ago. But were they? Maybe the average level of happiness was always the same, varying greatly person-to-person.
I can already tell I’m going to enjoy Mr. Brooks’ writing. Looking forward to next time. Thank you.
Sounds like a guy who needs to get out to the farm and turn over soil and maybe shovel out a horse stall.
I recently read a useless article in NYT on being proactive about finding community. What strategies are there for finding friends and happiness as a retired adult, whose mind is still keen?
I would love to know how to be more happy living with hypochondria. Worry seems to be one of the main drivers for unhappiness (anxiety). I look forward to reading your column.
You asked for suggestions. Do you have suggestions for very young adults that, say, a parent might share with their kids? Asking for a friend.
Excited to read your columns. I have enjoyed reading you books and I am excited for your new one.
I look forward to learning more. My life took a turn as a teen when my father passed. A switch turned on and I became a "me against the world" person. My faith was damaged, my outlook turned negative. I used medication and alcohol to feel better. This I learned after 30 years was not the answer and likely caused more suffering. I got sober and thought it would be the cure. It wasn't. The happiness I searched for didn't magically appear. One week ago I retired and I thought that would be the cure. Hard work and savings finally paid off. Travel, golf, skiing, and the immense love of my wife, daughter, and grandkids had to be the key. Sadly no. My health is good, the stress of my working years is no longer. Why am I not on a cloud? Hopefully you can teach me a little about what can be done to make my outlook a bit more happy.
Thank you for your work. I’ve been following your content for years, mainly through podcasts. But never really learned your own happiness journey in this depth. When I saw you in The Free Press, I felt my “world’s” were colliding — and in the very best way. I look forward to your column; and it is coming at just the right time for myself and as you stated, for all of us.
You make it sound like happiness is nearly 100% within the control of an individual. But a lot of unhappiness is attributable to what others are doing. Yes, we control our response to the actions of others, both near and distant. But that doesn't mean those actions don't still deeply undermine individuals. I hope you address that reality.
My sainted mum told me that time flies when you are happy, unfortunately it also flies when you are unhappy. The choice she also told me is up to you. Happiness is like boredom, if you are bored it is because you are boring.
For virtually all of human history, "happiness" was neither a goal nor even a recognized concept.
The daily objective of the average person has historically been to not starve to death, to not be torn asunder by wild animals, to not be killed by aggressive human rivals, and to not die from chronic infections and diseases.
And yet amidst our unexpected, remarkable, indeed miraculous good fortune, "Anger, stress, sadness, and worry have reached historic highs?" No, they have not. It's simply that we have the extraordinary luxury of staring at our navels and worrying endlessly about the lint therein.
Thank you for expressing so well precisely what I was thinking.
Right, we do have that extraordinary luxury; and I for one am glad those like MrBrooks are helping society reconcile the gap between that fact (our luck to be born now) and the day-to-day reality many live with. It seems we spend our time (as a global population) on much less noble or valuable pursuits than understanding how our caveman mind deals with this advanced world.
I hope that your next piece will provide your personal definition of “happiness.” In reading the comments and even in reading your piece, it seems to me that what constitutes happiness is not the same thing for everyone.
I wasn't going to read this as I am an extremely optimistic person and generally happy. But I have a 20 something cynical, pessimistic daughter who I pray for nightly. I literally ask the Lord to give her peace and contentment and gratitude. Maybe this column will have tips I can pass on to her. Ironically, she was raised in privilege with an intact family, while my background is full of abuse, abandonment and poverty. But I knew the Lord from an early age and though I tried to raise her to know Him as well, she still is unhappy.
I have quoted many times from a speech you gave in Houston while you were still with AEI. The essence of it was the secret to a happy life was “use things and love people” not the other way around. Welcome to TFP - my daughter works there too!
He wrote a NYT article about it as well. So simple, yet powerful, here is an excerpt that I refer to often:
This was Abd al-Rahman's formula as he sleepwalked through life. It is the worldly snake oil peddled by the culture makers from Hollywood to Madison Avenue. But you know in your heart that it is morally disordered and a likely road to misery. You want to be free of the sticky cravings of unhappiness and find a formula for happiness instead. How? Simply invert the deadly formula and render virtuous:
Love people, use things.