Down with Pickleball! Long Live Tennis

(Kevin Dietsch via Getty Images)
Pickleballers must be stopped—for the good of the courts and the nation.
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One of my favorite things about sports is that they provide a mostly harmless setting for me to vent my more bloodcurdlingly reactionary impulses, which, if I applied them to the political realm, might result in my favoring things such as the restoration of Stuart sovereignty over North America or the prosecution and public flogging of Uber drivers who …
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