Welcome back. This is a weekly news summary, told with bias.
→ Elon x Trump divorce: It’s the breakup of the year. Elon Musk is turning on Trump, Trump on Elon, and there is no prenup. It started slowly. Politics has exhausted Musk, who explained in an interview earlier this week on CBS News Sunday Morning: “I’m a little stuck in a bind, where I’m like, well, I don’t want to, you know, speak up against the administration, but I also don’t want to take responsibility for everything the administration’s doing.” Later Musk posted to X: “I’m sorry, but I just can’t stand it anymore. This massive, outrageous, pork-filled Congressional spending bill is a disgusting abomination,” starting the public breakdown between the two giants of MAGA.
And this was just the prelude.
Trump responded calmly a couple days later: “Elon and I had a great relationship, I don’t know if we will anymore. . . . And he hasn’t said bad about me personally, but I’m sure that’ll be next. But I’m very disappointed in Elon.” And lo, Elon was saying bad things about him. Or at least laughing at anti-Trump memes, which is how these people communicate with each other.
With seemingly no provocation, Musk decided to drop his credit card on the table: “Without me, Trump would have lost the election, Dems would control the House and the Republicans would be 51–49 in the Senate.” He added a message to members of Congress who are deciding where their loyalties should lie in this divorce: “Oh and some food for thought as they ponder this question: Trump has 3.5 years left as President, but I will be around for 40+ years. . . ” Basically: Look, kids, you might like Mom’s house, but I want you to think about which one of us can buy you your own house one day.
Trump responded by calling Musk “CRAZY!” And adding: “The easiest way to save money in our Budget, Billions and Billions of Dollars, is to terminate Elon’s Governmental Subsidies and Contracts.”
One of Musk’s angry baby mamas wrote that she was available to President Trump for advice on the breakup.
Ousted from both sides, his cars attacked at random, Tesla stock crashing 17 percent in a single day, shamed by his women, we now find our hero (Elon Musk) humiliated. But public shaming is just part of the Trump administration exit package. Remember “dumb as a rock” Rex Tillerson? Rex didn’t need that.
As Thursday wore on, Elon escalated. “Time to drop the really big bomb,” Musk posted. “Donald Trump is in the Epstein files. That is the real reason they have not been made public. Have a nice day, DJT!”
Trump eventually responded with curious calm to his best friend’s betrayal: “I don’t mind Elon turning against me, but he should have done so months ago. This is one of the Greatest Bills ever presented to Congress.” We just have to wait till 3 a.m. to get the real presidential take.